Welcome to my Writings
Over the years I have written about experiences and contemplations that have had a profound effect on the way I look at life and myself. The following are links to my writings. Most of these writings deal with very personal experiences and occurances. I have no shame about who I am or what I have done. Everyone deals with their existance in different ways. I would like to ask that you read the comments before going into each section. They will attempt to set up any history and justifications. Enjoy the look into my mind. I would love to hear any feedback you might have. bob@urbanproductions.com
Dancing on the Edge
This is a story about what I consider to be an extrodinary day in my life. I was 16 and confused about who I was. I felt deep down inside that the reality of my world was not what I was led to believe. My grandfarther seemed to be the only one who took my questions seriously and had helped me to search, but he had been gone for about 3 years by this time. I felt alone and confused. So I ran.
Finding Reality
It was January 1, 1997. The beginning of a new year and I had had enough of the the past years. My world did not make sense to me. I had questions about what all this around us is and how I played a part in it (reality). I was confused and unfocused when I looked at life mostly because I believed the concepts of life that were taught to me were wrong. I grew up in a catholic household with parents that were more concerned about how the family looked to others than they were about dealing with what was. I had spent many years randomly looking at different aspect of my reality, but with each contemplation I feared I was headed down a one way dead end street with no answers. On this new years I walked into my office, turned off the phone and closed the door. For 13 hours I smoked pot and searched for the end of the road I was going down. I needed to get to the end and find out what the questions pinned up on the wall were. The core of what I was searching for if you will. I figured that if I found what the core questions were for me, I could start focusing on finding those answers. I became so focused during the 13 hours of searching that after the piece was completed, I was mentally drained to the point of not remembering my name or knowing where I was (I was at a bar where a buddy of mine gigged) which lasted for about 20 minutes. It was very much a pivotal point in my life.Perceptions
The following was written 21 months before 'Finding Reality' and gives a peak into my developing way of thinking. This piece mostly deals with the perception of time, but also delves into parts of the human psyche.More to come as I convert them to HTML.